Exploration

Exploring one's sexual preferences is a personal journey that can be complex and nuanced. For AFAB trans-masculine queers, navigating feelings of guilt surrounding early experiences with gay porn can be particularly challenging. Society often imposes rigid norms and expectations on individuals based on assigned gender at birth, creating internal conflict when these individuals begin to explore their true desires and attractions. The guilt associated with watching gay porn may stem from societal stigma, internalized shame, or conflicting messages about sexuality. It is essential for individuals to recognize and validate their feelings without judgment, seeking support from understanding communities or mental health professionals if needed. By embracing their authentic selves and unpacking internalized guilt, AFAB trans-masculine queers can cultivate a healthier relationship with their sexual preferences and identity.

2024 | 8” x 10” | Watercolor, colored pencil

Introspection

Staring into my own reflection as a child, I often delved into deep introspection to unravel the layers of my identity, emotions, and physical being. It was in these quiet moments of contemplation that I sought clarity amidst the enigma of self-discovery. Navigating the labyrinth of my thoughts and memories, I strived to forge a harmonious resolution that resonated with the essence of my individual experiences. The looking glass became a portal to introspective conversations that transcended the superficial, leading me to acknowledge and embrace the intricate threads weaving the tapestry of my existence. Each gaze marked a step towards understanding and acceptance, propelling me towards a profound connection with the evolving self.

2024 | 10” x 8” | Watercolor, colored pencil

Experimentation

For many transgender individuals, taking hormones marks a significant milestone in their journey towards aligning their physical bodies with their gender identity. The decision to undergo hormone replacement therapy is deeply personal and complex, with emotional and physical implications that are not to be underestimated. While optional, this step is often viewed as a crucial component of the transitioning process, allowing individuals to experience changes that can affirm their gender identity. The effects of hormone therapy go beyond the physical, impacting one's sense of self and well-being in profound ways. As such, the decision to pursue hormonal transition is a weighty one, requiring thorough consideration and often accompanied by a range of emotions.

2024 | 8” x 10” | Watercolor, colored pencil